Chris Brown - One Woman's Take

I’ve been wondering why according to internet blogs, FB statuses, tweets and day to day conversations why women tend to be more forgiving and tolerant of Chris Brown and his public displays of immaturity. As a Chris Brown fan, from the first time he stepped onto the scene, I must say that I genuinely want to see him succeed. He sort of reminds me of my son. Maybe my allegiance to him is related to that fact. But I’ve noted that many women, even some without sons are really pulling for him too.

As the story goes, everyone knows that he physically abused singer, Rhianna, a couple of years past. He took some domestic violence classes as well as performed some community service and just a couple of days ago a judge lifted the restraining order Rhianna had against him – at the singer’s request. This week, he was on Good Morning America being interviewed by Robyn Robinson and became agitated with questions asked about the Rhianna incident. He carried himself to his dressing room and there commenced to acting like a straight fool by tearing up the room and throwing a chair out of the window. Mind you, this is the same day that his new album dropped (F.A.M.E.). Publicity stunt??? Maybe.

Still though, the public (women) seem to be forgiving and understanding. 

So here’s my assessment – my very feminine assessment:

I won’t speak about the Rhianna incident because I don’t want to suffer his wrath. He might come find me and thrash my house. LOL! Really though, I will speak to the fact that this 21 year old kid has some serious issues with anger and frustration. He hasn’t a clue how to work through either of these things and what he knows is that punching something makes the hurt and pain disappear (even for a moment it's worth it to him). How did he go through hours our classes on violence and no one go this through to him? Did Charlie Sheen teach the class? It would be the first thing I’d try to help him recognize about himself if I were his therapist or instructor.  Chris you have go to find ways to relieve yourself of the anger once you reach your boiling point.  Thank goodness he was able to not slap the shit out of Robyn. 

Some think that Chris is young and immature. Yes! I follow him on twitter and one of his tweets read, “I have gas. LOL!” I’d venture to say that’s immature.

Some think he’s a victim. Yes! He has admitted that he watched his mother being abused growing up. This makes him a victim of domestic violence. One may think (of course who have never been through or witnessed this abuse) that since he saw it happening that he should know better. Unfortunately, that’s not what happens in abusive situations especially to young, tender hearts and minds.

I think that if he does not get it together and begin to hold himself accountable for his actions he will find that anger will have taken over his existence. I’ve seen how that plays out for a very particular man and he hasn’t embraced happiness to this day. I’d hate to see it happen to Chris.

Am I defending him? NO. 

Do I think he has issues? Yes.

Do we throw him away because he just so happens to be in the public eye fighting against these issues? Absolutely not!

I am a firm believer that enough good will eventually take over bad. I believe that anyone who wants help and wants improvement can have it. What remains to be seen is whether Chris wants to be better. I tend to think he does. Hell, apparently so does Rhianna.

Chris Brown is his own champion. If he wants to get it together, he can. If he doesn’t see a problem, he won’t. But I will continue to pray for him. Maybe it’s because I’m a mother. Maybe it’s because I look at him and see a little boy going through the trials all men face when becoming a man. I don’t mean that all men beat women during this time of life. I am simply stating that the transition from boy to man is thorough and precise. If one is not ready to face it in all areas of life, there will be situations to arise that can either make or break him. All men go through it in some fashion. Some just don’t have to do it publicly.

Maybe when men see this situation they only see the action and not the reason for the action. This would explain why women, filled with emotion and hope, continue to believe in Chris. While men, the unattached, unemotional creature we love, tend to think that he just needs to get it together. It seems very obvious to my feminine spirit that this young man is drench in pain and doesn’t know how to manage his anger because of it. While I don’t condone his erratic behavior, I can’t dismiss that he’s clearly broken. If you’ve never had anger fill your heart, then you can easily determine that he needs to go to jail or needs to “get it together”. Well, speaking as one who has been angry and seen anger consume others, it’s simply not as easy to do as it is to say.

Praying for you Chris.